S: I already wiped the counters.
Me: You think they are clean, but they are not. Bend down to eye level.
S: That’s disgusting!
Me: Yes. Yes, you are.
Raising teenagers is not all fun and games with blissful vacations. Teenagers (and their tweenage counterparts) can be absolutely awful! I can’t tell you what I find in the backseat of my car, tucked unsuspectingly into cupholders or seat pockets. Cups and dishes are literally EVERYWHERE (despite a no food upstairs rule). And don’t even get me started on backpacks and lunchboxes!
This is precisely why I purchased “How to be a Person” by Catherine Newman. I needed these small humans of mine to actually participate in being, well, humans!
Full disclosure, my children have regular chores. They are responsible for their own laundry and unload the dishwasher every morning. Our first born gets to choose whether to unload the top or bottom on odd days and our 2nd born chooses on the even days. They make their own lunches and usually their own breakfast in the morning before school. And they will clean their bathrooms with prodding, and walk the dogs each morning. I know that they do more around the house than most of their peers. But at 12 and 14 years old I’ve started seeing their futures in terrifyingly sharp detail. While they are far more capable than my youngest sister was when she moved out, there are severe gaps in their ability to be “people” who function in society.
“How to be a Person” goes through 65 every day tasks that adults take for granted. It runs the gamut from unclogging a toilet and writing a thank you note to packing for a trip and calculating a tip. It is funny. Engaging. And downright spot on for teenagers! Take this excerpt from the chapter on answering the phone:
“If your phone rings-either a cell phone or landline- tap the green button or the word “answer”…and say, “Hello.” (When someone calls you, you need to be the one to speak first.)”
I can’t stop giggling. The adult in me is like, well, DUH! But the parent in me has literally had this conversation with my oldest daughter! We’ve also had to tackle the “how to hang up the phone” conversation…you can’t just hang up.
The author’s voice and the illustrations take this book from a boring “how to” and thrusts it right into “funny, laughing at myself because I’ve totally done this.” The answering the phone chapter continues…“Talking on the phone is easiest if you are quiet and attentive-that is not chewing, whistling, playing the ukulele, or paying close attention to something else, like TV, your gerbil Eeny-Beeny, or algebra.”
“How to be a Person” would make a fantastic gift for someone entering middle school, high school, or even a graduation present if you know a high school senior who may have lived a very comfortable, catered to life. It also makes a great summer read for parents and kids alike. Instead of practicing a foreign language or brushing up on geometry, they can learn how to be productive members of society, and make your life a little easier in the process! It’s a win win for everyone!
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